第153章(2/2)

直到我不得不直面现实,我才后知后觉,跌跌撞撞跪在她床边,颤颤巍巍跪在她床边,拿出梦幻的照片,哭着抽噎说:“老板娘……梦幻,其,实梦幻……也来看你了,你看一……眼好不好,好不好?”

要来和我赴约,因还没到日子而没来的梦幻……

梦幻,我的梦幻。

从最开始的歇斯底里,

“嘶——”我头痛欲裂,怔怔地盯着手中的照片,搞不清为什么会带这个。我无力地往后一靠,闭眼仰头倚在墙上,冰凉的触感令我稍稍清醒一点,我睁开布满血丝,盯着雪白的屋顶,就连什么时候回到家的,都不知道。

她……死了。

我冷冷地盯着那个曾经向封建和男权妥协,抛弃了老板娘的人。背叛过的人,有什么资格再去奢求什么呢,爱一个人就要坚定不移,哪怕去死。

江夫人:“游欢,你到底把她藏到哪去了?!”过去这么多年,她还在对老板娘执念纠缠,而老板娘到死也没有原谅她,两个人就这么互相折磨,磨尽了一生,终于,还是老板娘赢了,你看,她彻彻底底地丢弃了江夫人。

她死了啊!!!

么要破土而出了,但被老板娘再次打断。

我抵着墙面缓缓滑落,跌坐在地板上,我双目赤红,瞳孔剧烈地晃动着,失踪许久的泪水还是无法抑制地大滴滚落,用自欺欺人强行黏住有了无数裂缝的心脏终于不堪重负地破碎崩坏,一个个无比锋利的碎片朝着我的身体各个最柔软无助的内脏割去,划破我脆弱的灵魂。

“把我火化了,找个远离尘嚣的地方,随手埋了吧。”女人缓慢地转过头,浑浊的眼睛无神地看着上空,似乎在回忆她的一生,慢慢的,她闭上了眼睛。

我一无所有,我失去了我的梦幻。

没有梦幻不耐烦的回答,没有她轻扬的声音,没有她温柔的回应,没有,没有,没有没有!什么也没有了!什么——也没有了!!

老板娘的事由我一手操办,回国后公司里也有很多事需要我处理,这使我忙碌起来,直到老板娘已经被我依照她的遗愿安顿在郊区外一个宁静的地带后,那个人拦住了我回家的路。

心跳仪器发出划出直线的警告,我愣愣地站在原地,无所知觉。

我嘴角勾着浅浅的弧度,眼里格外平静,木讷地等了几十秒钟,可除了我的声音,冰箱运作的声音,什么也没有。

第151章

梦幻?!

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死亡,死亡,多么遥不可及,多么陌生,多么可怕的事,生生劈头盖脸地朝我砸来。

我本想嘲讽地告诉她,老板娘死了,她永远也找不到她了,可是我说不出口,死这个字,宛若总不能开口的忌讳,一旦开口了,我就会万劫不复,那比死亡还要可怕。

“啊啊啊——”我抓着自己的头发,身体脱力地狠狠撞在墙面上,撕心裂肺地尖叫出来,尖锐陌生的声音欲要刺破我的耳膜,久久回荡在寂寞的房屋里。

梦幻?

渐渐地,我开始有些分不清过去和现实,昨天的事似乎没发生,又感觉那是未来才会发生的事,我只是预言似的知道了而已,而今天的事不真切,感觉我在经历昨日,它们的时间错乱交杂,记忆力变得一塌糊涂,偶尔发觉了,我却冷静异常,周围人看我的眼神,那种气氛令我格外逃避,压抑的内心跟即将沸腾的开水无异。

回到家,我打开冰箱,默默盯着老板娘送给我们的饺子,对着漆黑空荡的房间喊了声:“梦幻,老板娘得了癌症住院了,我们做点好吃的送过去吧,这回就别放她不爱吃的了。”

终于,握着冰箱柜门的手停止颤栗的抖动,徒然发了疯地猛然一摔,用尽全力,无能为力的狂怒只能通过可笑的爆发式破坏来宣泄。

“梦幻,梦幻!啊——为什么为什么为什么,我不相信,我不相信你就这么离开我了,为什么啊——!!”我哭喊着,蜷缩着,祈求这不是真的。

“游欢, 你病了,我们去看医生好不好?”

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