第19章(2/2)

静姝握住她的手,十指相扣:“这条路是你选的,也是我选的。从嫁你那日起,我便知道不寻常。可我不悔。”

君瑜低下头,学着静姝的样子,轻轻摇晃手臂。孩子盯着她看了会儿,忽然咧开没牙的嘴,笑了。

两人更衣躺下,帐内一片静谧。承嗣睡在隔壁暖阁,有奶娘守着,可静姝还是竖着耳朵,听着那边的动静。

“承嗣,”她低声唤,“我是你父亲。”

nbsp; 静姝已迎上去,从奶娘手中接过孩子。襁褓里的婴儿正睡着,小脸红扑扑的,睫毛长长的,在眼睑下投出浅浅的阴影。他比静姝想象中小许多,软软的一团,抱在怀里几乎没有重量。

这些话,零零碎碎飘进君瑜耳中。她面不改色,依旧含笑应酬。静姝在内院陪女眷,想必听得更多。

“承嗣。”她轻声唤。

四目相对的一瞬,君瑜心头一震。这孩子确实有几分潘家人的轮廓,眉眼间依稀能看见弟弟君珏的影子。可那双眼睛的干净澄澈,却让她想起静姝。

像是听见了,孩子动了动,小嘴努了努,又沉沉睡去。

她声音不高,却字字清晰。怀中的承嗣忽然“咿呀”一声,小手在空中抓了抓,像是应答。

话音落,她自己先怔了怔。父亲这个称呼,她叫了别人二十多年,如今竟有人要叫她父亲。

最后一步,是祭告祖先。

命运的安排,何其荒诞,又何其温柔。

也有人小声议论:“过继的终究不如亲生的。”“嘘,少说两句。潘大人正值盛年,将来未必没有亲生。”

“谢谢你还愿信我,还愿与我一起,走这条最难的路。”

“累了?”君瑜走过去,手搭在她肩上。

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宴散时,已是月上中天。送走最后一位客人,君瑜回到正房。静姝已换了常服,正坐在床边,看着摇篮里的承嗣。孩子睡着了,小手握成拳,放在腮边。

“静姝,”她轻声说,“谢谢你。”

宴席上,同僚们纷纷道贺。沈编修喝得满脸通红,拍着君瑜的肩:“潘兄,恭喜恭喜!这下可好了,后继有人,福气还在后头呢!”

马车在此时颠了一下,君瑜下意识收紧手臂,将孩子护在怀中。那一瞬间,某种陌生的、汹涌的情绪席卷了她,这是她的孩子。是她和静姝的孩子。

祠堂里香烟缭绕。君瑜抱着承嗣,孩子今日格外安静,睁着眼,看着牌位上的字,在潘父灵位前跪下。静姝跪在她身侧,两人三叩首。

“先回府吧。”她上前,替静姝拢了拢披风,“风大。”

她顿了顿,看向承嗣:“如今有了他,我更不悔。君瑜,我们会是好父母的,对不对?”

一个无声的、纯粹的笑。

“他看你呢。”静姝轻声说。

一双清澈的、乌溜溜的眼睛,正好奇地看着她。

君瑜站在一步之外,看着这一幕。静姝抱着孩子,低头凝视的模样,温柔得像一幅画。她心中某个坚硬的地方,忽然软了一下。

过继仪式定在三日后。那日潘府开了中门,族中在京的亲戚都到了,翰林院、户部也来了几位同僚。申时行虽未亲至,却派人送来贺礼,一套文房四宝,寓意深远。

仪式在正堂举行。潘君瑜一身绯红官服,静姝着诰命礼服,两人并立香案前。老管家宣读潘氏族谱,将“潘承嗣”之名郑重录入君瑜一支下,记为嫡长子。而后奉上过继文书,君瑜与静姝按了手印,苏州那边早已有潘母和君珏夫妇的画押。

君瑜在她身边坐下,也看向摇篮。月光从窗棂漏进来,洒在孩子脸上,那小小的五官显得格外柔和。

虽然血缘不相连,虽然来历非常,但从今往后,这个小小的人儿,便是她们在这世上最深的牵绊。

马车里,静姝一直抱着孩子,舍不得放下。君瑜坐在对面,看着她们,忽然说:“给我抱抱。”

礼成。

那夜,她们并肩坐在床边,看了孩子很久。直到更鼓传来,静姝才起身:“睡吧,明日你还要上朝。”

“不累。”静姝仰头看她,眼里有倦色,却满是温柔,“今日我们真的有孩子了。”

静姝小心地将孩子递过来。君瑜接过,动作有些僵硬,她从未抱过这么小的婴儿。那孩子在她臂弯里扭了扭,忽然睁开眼。

“对。”君瑜回答得毫不犹豫。

“列祖列宗在上,不孝孙君瑜,今立嗣子承嗣,承继香火,延续门楣。伏乞祖宗庇佑,佑此子平安康健,正直仁善。”

“谢我什么?”

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