第91章(2/2)

“我这才懂外公上次说的话是什么意思。”我按摩着他的大腿,劝他放松,“他们为什么要瞒着我呢?我为什么不能知道这件事情?”

季凝遇去洗澡时,我开始收拾行李。要带的东西不多,其中有一块还是季凝遇强制塞进去的。季叔那边给我安排好了房子和交通工具,他从不吝啬,给我的东西都是顶好的。

他仰头望着我回:“休息时间还要管我睡到这个时候,又在电话里说你怎么怎么勤快。我真服了爸爸,他那么反对我们两个,却老在我面前提起你。”季凝遇手臂撑着,坐直上半身,“他估计都数不清,从小到大在我面前表扬过你多少次。”

“可这让我从小都弄不明白妈妈的情绪,无法理解她的症结到底在哪。”季凝遇撩了撩头发,“我不是没想过和她好好沟通,在我们冷战的时候,可妈妈从不让我知道她的情绪和压力源。”

nbsp;“行,我知道了,我不会迟到。”他胸腔随着急促的呼吸起伏着,贴着我的身体,我能感受到另一颗心脏的跳动。

“我、我……”他视线又失神地望向某处,每当陷入痛苦回忆,就会露出这样的表情。我轻轻拍着他的脊背,低声哄着:“你没有做错任何事,我知道你是有孝心的孩子,你很爱爸爸妈妈,这些我都看在眼里,懂吗?”

说到这里,他沉默了许久,神色仍未完全放松。我便顺势替他按了会儿肌肉,让他从情绪的漩涡里抽离出来。幸好昨天我们有所收敛,他身体也逐渐适应,不至于在等会儿的饭局上显得不自然。

这顿饭只有四个人,没人多说话,反倒是向来话少的温姨最热情。对她来说,我的离开似乎是一件好事。

“又说什么让你不开心了?”我垂眼问他。

“凝遇。”我沉声叫他,“其实叔叔不见得有多反对我们,自始至终,这件事对你妈妈来说才是不太能接受的。”

“他们不想说,自然有他们的打算。”

“亲爱的,我跟你说件事。”凝遇不该因为父母对我的态度而把情绪投射到他们身上,如果我的加入破坏了他们家庭内部的关系,那就是我的罪过。我希望大家好好的,就必须付出努力。于是我牵着他的双手,抬头认真看着他,交代了他“哥哥”的那件事情。

季凝遇自此知道了家里隐瞒多年的消息。

今后,他该如何面对爸妈,用怎样的心境去生活,都是他需要独立做出的选择。我明白,他的内心注定会翻江倒海,却依然会在外人面前装作云淡风轻。我更清楚,他大概不会立刻有巨大的转变,但或许会尝试用另一种方式去爱他的母亲。我相信,他终究会做出正确的抉择,逐渐变得更好。

“我从没听说过这些!”他瞪着眼睛,诧异地看我,身上那点起床的晕乎感全都褪去了,“我不知道我还可能有个哥哥,妈妈从没和我说过这些。”

他又嗯声点着几下头,最后将电话挂了,将手机一把扔在床上。

“不要去责怪他们的选择。”我托着他的身体,坐起身,把他抱在怀里,“你现在不是已经能理解他们一点了吗?”

“可这样我就不能送你去机场了!”季凝遇有些急了,开始暴躁,“爸爸肯定会让王叔送你去机场,他不知道我们在一起,我非开车去不可!我不能送你!”

“这怎么办?”季凝遇叉着腰扶额,一脸无奈。

“shhh……冷静。”我环住他的肩膀,“先去吃饭,不急后面的事,好不好?”

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“没事,王叔是自己人,我打电话让他过来就行。”

吃到最后,我得赶去机场。季凝遇不知哪来的勇气,趁妈妈出去时,主动向季叔提出要送我去机场的请求。存影叔犹豫了片刻,最后睁一只眼闭一只眼,说了句:“别让你妈知道。”就同意让他跟着我出发了。

他情绪激动,整个人下意识地绷紧,我的腰一时间被压得微微酸疼。他后知后觉地喃喃自语,嘴里念着没想到妈妈经历过这些,没想到这些离奇的事情会发生在妈妈身上,痛苦会笼罩并伴随她的半生。那些从未被家人提及、被刻意隐瞒的往事,骤然揭开,让他一时难以消化,更难以接受。

我们一齐收拾好,把行李放上后备箱,季凝遇开车。正准备向饭店出发,季叔来电话,说安排了王叔到我家楼下接我,可我现在就在凝遇这儿。

我倾听、我交谈。存影叔除了在知道凝遇性取向的那一刻让我感受到前所未有的愤怒,但大多数时候,他都是温和沉默的。那件事后,我觉得他看起来有些沧桑,但他从未再对我表现出巨大的敌意或排斥。

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